I was there again today.
same place. same chair. same musics. same weather.
The only thing that was different is, me.
Cold, waiting.
Waiting for miracle to happen.
Miracle that never happened before,
nor it happen today.
Now i can say, i'm used to it.
Saya kebal. Sebal dan juga bebal 😁

A year is all you need.

when one take your request for granted.
because they don't know how important the thing is for you even it just a very little request.
because it have no importance to them, they just don't care.





5 minutes won't kill, you know?

Lelaki bersuara merdu.
Major turn on oh!
HAHAHA.
like come on, siapa tak cair?
yang tak hensem pun boleh jadi hensem :D

*SCREAM*

I am soo excited. Zulaikha, Nadia and i just started our not-so-mini project last night and it was awesome! Can't wait to release our own collection!!! We couldn't believe that we manage to make this on our own! We make our own **** ! how awesome is that? OMG OMG!

Here's a little sneak peak on what we are up to. Stay tuned ! xoxo :*

Hello. My name is Ahmadaboubrabelle. Belle for short. I love to sew :) and eat too. that is why i'm licking my own nose, because i'm so hungry !

I still holding these pieces of my broken heart.
I wish one day, u will come back to fix them again to the way it used to be.
Because no one else can do it.
Because no one else knows how does it looks like before it became broken.

Kadang kadang, kata kata yang dilahirkan dari mulut tak sama dengan kata kata yang dipendam dalam hati kan?

Sometimes, i hope you show that you care. Walaupun sikit, walaupun sekali.

memberi tanpa mengharapkan balasan itu kadang kala lebih membahagiakan.
No expectation, no disappointment.

mimpi indah itu mungkin menggembirakan.
boleh membuatkan manusia membuka mata sambil tersenyum.
tapi untuk aku, itu dulu.

sekarang,
mimpi indah hanya mampu membuat aku sedih.
bangun dengan air bertakung dalam mata,

mimpi hana. bukan realiti

This is all me, talking to myself. 100% peringatan buat diri sendiri.

People come and go in our life. Whether we like it or not, we have to accept that.

It hurts when we really care about someone, and we miss them so much but it seems like they don't care about us. And worst, they don't even care that we care.

I’m generally talking about relationship here. Not just about lovey dovey relationship all alone. Bosan lah asyik fikir dalam kotak kecil pasal cinta dan lelaki kan. Tak berkembang.

I’ve been thinking how human behaves over and over again lately. Through some observations on others and self-reflection I realize something that was very...hm what we call it eh? Tak sedap lah...

Sometimes we just were being nice to people for our own good or for the sake of to be seen as a nice person in front of other people. We act like we're one of the best things that they have. But for real, we don't really care. We talks behind each other's back, make fun of other people, bullies, and walk away from them when they need us. And when they did the same to us, they're the bad person.

Fuh. Palsunya manusia.

Secara fitrahnya, manusia memang suka bercakap. Tak dapat dinafikan. Secara logiknya, nobody can be there for us every time we need them aite. I agree with that. But I don't know. Too much is too much aite?

Sekarang, rasa takut untuk berkongsi dengan sesiapa pun.

Because the one that you shares your secrets might turned out to be the one who leak your secrets. Secara sengaja, atau tidak. And because sometimes, people act like they won't judge. But they did all the judging, just not in front of you.

I rather have someone who can scold me right on my face for my mistakes, wrong action and misbehave than someone who shows that they care, they totally understands and tries to make me feel better then point out the ugly side of me, one by one, to other people.

Realitinya, kita semua pernah melakukan kesalahan. Manusia kan tak sempurna. Every each one of us pernah buat semua ni, kan? Penipu lah manusia yang mengaku tidak pernah sama sekali mengumpat, menghakimi dan juga menghukum. Mungkin bagi kita, apa yang kita buat tu bukan mengumpat. it’s not judging.

Tapi kalau bukan mengumpat, bukan menghakimi, and then what?

Jujur lah pada diri sendiri. Mengaku kelemahan diri. That’s the least we can do for ourselves.

Admitting our own mistakes is the start for self-improvement aite?

Dan menghukum tu tugas Allah. Walau besar mana pun kesalahan orang, jangan cepat menghukum. Sebab hukuman manusia tidak selalunya adil. Kalau seseorang tu layak dihukum, biar lah Allah yang jadi Penghukum nya. Bukan kita, manusia yang juga layak dihukum.

Pernah dengar ayat ni?

"Don’t judge someone just because they sin differently than you"

Ingat dalam akal. Simpan dalam hati :)

No, I don't want to break when I speak
I don't want to shake while I'm standing
I don't want to crawl into another hole
I don't know what I'm hiding for

No, I don't want to fall when I stand
I don't want to have to hold your hand
I just want to be the girl i used to be

when i was me and worry-free
I know these burdens are my own

But I can't keep on running
No I just can't keep on running away from here
I know that the only way to beat it is by fighting my every fear
I'm not going to make it 'til I turn around and face it alone,

I know. So it stops today

So here I am, I'm taking my first step
Thought I was losing balance but I caught myself
I kind of like the challenge, no I don't need help
I'm going to make it past the very start
It's always been my hardest part

But I'm going to stay in control
I must admit this crutch is getting old
I am going to throw it right out of my hand
I'm finally here, I understand
I know I'll get there on my own

You can hide from all the pain
But it will find you anyway
Yes, I know, now I know.

biarlah apa orang kata.
aku tahu apa aku buat.
aku tahu apa yang akan aku tanggung.

Penghapus stress of the day!

Kalau ini superman.. 

Yang ini apa?Hihi.

Kacaknya superman ni ! siap duckface lagi. meoww

Wishlist.

wishlist.
banyak benda yang aku nak.
ada yang teringin. ada yang perlu.
yang menghalang?
duit, belum tiba masa dan sesetengah benda tu rasa lebih best kalau orang bagi. (hikhik)

aku bukan jenis yang berani minta. kadang2 berani lah kalau nak minta setakat chocolate kinderbueno RM4 dengan mama sebab mama pun suka. tapi kebiasaannya, aku tak minta. sebab aku tak boleh terima kalau aku terima jawapan 'tak boleh'. or 'tak perlu'

nanti aku sedih. nanti aku menangis. macam kanak kanak kan? haha. al maklum lah. lacrimal gland saya mempunyai masalah kritikal. cepat sangat detect stimuli. over sensitive. sarah cakap itu alasan. tapi aku rasa percentage untuk perkara itu betul, adalah tinggi. ayyu hagah lah hana oi.

jadi, aku senaraikan apa yang aku idamkan selama ni. sebahagian besar, aku akan cuba untuk dapatkan, dengan usaha aku sendiri. dan aku tak harap aku akan dapat pun. cuma, bila orang tanya apa aku nak, aku selalu tak tahu nak jawab apa. tiba tiba segala benda yang aku nak hilang dari ingatan. haha. temporary memory lost. bila orang tak tanya, tiba tiba ingat balik. melepas peluang

its gone.
no, they're gone.

the memories of three years , three complete years.
and just today, another pages of priceless memories are also gone.
gone for forever.
arghh.
menyesal tak undelete.


its okay. kenangan hilang di alam maya. bukan dalam ingatan.
tapi kenangan yang sama tak mungkin berulang kan?
sedih sikit.
tapi tak apa.
dah janji nak jadi hana yang kuat kan.
tak kan nak menangis sebab kenangan yang sepatutnya dilupakan.
kenangan yang tidak berharga bagi orang lain dan mungkin sudah dilupakan.

oh. look there, ego saya berkata kata.

selalu terfikir,
Ya Allah, beruntungnya rakyat Palestine. dapat berjihad, dapat mati syahid.
Orang mati syahid, confirm terus masuk syurga.
Ya Allah, nikmatnya dapat masuk syurga Allah.


dear my brothers and sisters in Gaza,
please hold on.
Tak kira betapa kuatnya serangan Israel,
kuasa Allah itu kan jauh lebih kuat.


selalu terfikir juga,
macam mana manusia boleh jadi sekejam itu?
apa perasaan mereka saat mereka membunuh manusia yang tak berdosa?
aku nak bunuh tikus pun, bergetar tangan. bukan sebab geli atau takut.
tapi sebab dia bernyawa. sama seperti aku.
padahal tikus tu jahat. curi makanan aku. kencing dan membuang merata. sesuka hati dia je.
tapi tetap, ia bernyawa. ada jantung yang berdegup.

Israel, tunggulah balasan dari Allah.
Janji Allah itu pasti.


#notetomyself : muhasabah diri. bersyukurlah dengan apa yang aku miliki sekarang. gunakan nikmat Allah bagi sebaik mungkin. kejar syurga Allah, dengan apa cara sekali pun. that is my jihad!

Distance.

The sun is filling up the room
And I can hear you dreaming
Do you feel the way I do right now?
I wish we would just give up
Cause the best part is falling
Call it anything but love

And please don't stand so close to me
I'm having trouble breathing
I'm afraid of what you'll see right now
I give you everything I am
All my broken heart beats
Until I know you understand

And I will make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

And I keep waiting
For you to take me
You keep waiting
To save what we have.




dear you,

we might had met and fall in love with each other at wrong timing. 

so many things happened , and it end so badly.

i believe that, that was something you didn't intend to make it happen and neither did i.

you made mistakes. so did i.

buti do have faith in us.

i do believe that this isn't 'the end' for our story.

i'm looking forward to met the right you, at the right moment so that everything will gonna be alright.

i just hope you'll be doing the same.

but for the time being,lets stop hurting each other and let it be the way it should be.

hi blogger.
selamat bertemu kembali.
rindu saya? ya, saya pun rindu kamu.

blog baru. hidup baru.
nak tulis yang gembira sahaja.
janji, tak ada cerita sedih dalam blog yang ini.

dan nak tulis sebaku mungkin. no short forms.

*ye letteww* .kbai